But yay! for this msi netbook my dad got me. Seriously, I have like the awesomest father in the world.

Went for reunion dinner at grammy’s house today. Wasn’t really hyped cos some of us weren’t really enthusiatic and, of course, Evan (but who can blame him for being an adorable, but temperamental kid, really?). Generally, it lacked family, really. It would reallyonly be a reunion if TGG and Aunt Leemei were here. ):

Man, I sound shallow.

Noticed that I can’t really write nowadays. Maybe it’s the lack of practice. I mean, I love diaries, but I hate writing in them. Hah, the irony.

Set out to maternal grammy’s house at 2211 hours so dad could join in the then-impending mahjong session. Brought my msi. I think I was kinda rude cos of it. My facade says I don’t care, but the mini-me sorta does, a little. (Listening to Starstrukk. Intrigues me about Katy Perry, and she’s gonna marry Rusell Brand. It’s kinda a huge joke to her song ‘Ur So Gay’, lol. Oops. What I mean is, kudos, Katy!)

(Now it’s this weird rap song. Jesus, the lyrics. Call me mr. flintstone //  I can make your bed rock. What kinda shit is UK listening to?)

Right, what was I ranting about?

Oh, yes.

Recite formalities, then retreated to kitchen first to use msi. Saw Brands styling his hair (what’s wrong with soft normal hair? I seriously don’t get why guys think gelled-up hair is a turn on. It’s hard and sticky-outty. Hmm, matched descriptions of a phalus. Lol, now I see why.) as I rinsed my hand. He asked a question, I replied. And then cut to awkward silence. Kinda got the feeling he expected me to carry the conversation on. But what could I ask him? I’m no expert at human relationships, I mean, come on, I stink at ‘em. But I probably got that from my dad, wahah. The little I know about him is his O’s. Couldn’t really ask him about that could I?

Actually, I blame him, really. He was the only cousin my age, and we were really close as kids. But we grew really distant growing up. He abandoned me, really. (I’m upset that I always get left behind. They get old first and then it’s like everything’s too lame for them. Happened with Brands, happened with the old neighbours too.) Began going out every time there was gathering. I mean, it’s supposed to be a reunion, for Heavens’ sake, how’s it even one if he keeps dodging out to muck about with his friends? In short, he’s not trying hard enough. Point, emma. (it’s supposed to be a sad smile )

Also, I generally ignored 90% of the people in the house, excluding Bryan, who kept pestering me to let hime use the internet, which I didn’t, and am now feeling kinda guilty about it ._. I don’t get why people countdown to Lunar New Year anyway, and even made a tv broadcast outta it. Didn’t we already do that for the actual New Year? Mum says I’m rude. I told her I can’t make meaningful human connections cos my brain and I are meant for greater things. Great people generally don’t live long enough, and one of the reason I think this is so, is because of a lack of companionship. I saw the study. Really. They’re isolists, like me. I hate crowds, and only have a friend or two, that I don’t even really know (or actually bother to care) if i can trust, really.  But come to think of it, it may be me pms-ing really. But I still hate crowds. Or rooms with more than 10 people that I am familiar with.

Wow, it’s 3 in the morn.

Happy Lunar New Year, people!

woo.

Speaking of LNY morning, I think the sentosa resort should be opened now, right? Or at least, partially opened. Lol.

Catched up on a couple of shows while at my maternal grandma’s house. I think White Collar’s tenth, “Vital Signs” was really good. We got to see Peter flirt, Neal opera-ing in a semi-drugged state, and a really heartfelt moment when Neal says that Pete is the only one he ever trusts. Aww. Plus, I love all the banter and their one-liners. Saw, Chuck. I think the simultaneously coupling is really discombobulating me, really, but Shaw and Sarah (SS!) help take my mind off Chuck and Hannah. Because, really, you can always stand the female seeing another guy, but you can NEVER stand seeing the guy with another girl, cos that’s just wrong and terribly eww-ish. It’s unreasonable, but it just is. (: Besides, Brandon Routh is seriously hot. But so it Matt Bomer.

*swoon*

*faints*

*gets up an repeats*

Lol. But really, both were considered for the role of Superman in Superman Returns, but the part went to Routh eventually, cos of the change of director. D: Not that I’m unhappy that Brandon got the part, but I just thought Matthew would make an awesome Superman too, hah.

I hope I can buy that beret tomorrow.

Hmm.

That’s all I guess.

This is actually really long.

No it is,

Really.

Hah.

(Seeing the BBT tag reminds me. LorrePrady and Co. have seriosuly gotta stop recycling the whole “I have a girlfriend and you don’t” thing and quit bullying Sheldon. I mean, I agree his some of his responses are hilarious, but Sheldon Cooper is comedy on his own and doesn’t need humor to be illicited from Leonard & gang’s relentless bullying. He should have his own show. )

I saw this article on EW about Jay Leno appearing on Oprah. He was clearly bullshitting on her show, and even though Oprah was standing on his side, I lauded her when she thought that Leno’s cheap shot at Letterman’s infidelity was “beneath him”. But then I wonder, is there even anything “beneath” Leno than himself, really?

And then I saw Oprah’s after-interview debate with the audience. And I’ve hated her ever since.

She’s clearly a Leno fan. And it seemed like she was trying to use her influence to shoot down all the Coco supporters, despite thorough and strongly supported arguments from their side. Also saw this Leno fan trying take down a Coco supporter over what she said. Her face just screamed for a trashing. No, seriously.

In short, I hate Leno, but I hate Oprah for defending him even more.

Gahh. Extracted the other 2 teeth on the right. The anesthesia makes my face feel weird. Plus, my gums won’t stop bleeding, ack.

Went to the library to return those freakishly overdued books. I owe the NLB $20++! O.O But tsk, I refuse to pay them back. Wahah. I’ll just buy the books I want from now. Besides, Dad used to promise me 20 bucks a month for books. Haven’t asked him to buy any for a long time. I wonder how much I’ve scrimped. Y’know, I have this naive wish that my dad or mum would own an awesome bookstore like Kinokuya or Page One (defo not Popular or Times, ack) so I could just sashay in and take any book I wanted. And believe me, I want a lot of books. Eh, who knows, maybe I’ll end up with one of them bookstores someday. But I hope that’ll be before I turn 33.

Saw Shaun at the mall’s parking lot today. Waved a little. He seemed kinda surprise. :O

“The Doctor.”

“Doctor who?”

wahahahah.

I felt like writing again.

Got thrown in the stupid chinese tuition. Jesus, who cares if we’re chinese who can’t speak chinese.

Anyway, I’m going to spend SIX weeks overseas. In China. Yep, you heard it. China. Or more specifically, Shanghai. I think I must’ve hit my head somewhere along the time I agreed. At first I was excited. But now, I’m just scared. I don’t like being homesick. :’(

Haiz.

Well, I could still back out if I don’t hand in that 500 bucks on monday.

Just wished one of the guys I knew was coming along ._.

I’m not man-crazy, okay!

Or maybe, I am. :O

Was sick for 2 days, still have this irritating cough now. Poned school! Actually, there’s not a lot of homework to catch up on too. *glee*

Thinking of cutting my hair like Parker’s from Leverage.

She is awesome, okay.

I don’t really like Ms Sia. But at least I’m not even nearly as rude as the horns. It’s like they’re effing asking for a damn trashing. Ahh, well.

Mr Wong is having a concert with Unity tonight. Or maybe, a few hours ago? I definitely maybe, almost, kinda sorta miss him really.

Oh, I just realized that there are actually awesome Singaporeans like Tracy Ku out there. Her english is wtf awesome. And her style is just boomz.

Eee. O.O My dad just tried to do apply some of his tcm shit techniques on me.

Weird.

Gah. There’re so many books I wanna read right now. But I haven’t even finished my lit books. Feel like there’s a giant L-shaped sign on my forehead now.

My beloved US SHOWS.

10 Thing I Hate About You only comes back 29 MARCH, wtf. Ethan Peck is ridiculously hot-slash-swoon-worthy. And Lindsey gets to make out with him. :O God is not fair. ): Lol, just kidding. And Gossip Girl only comes back 8 MARCH. I WANT MY SERENATE CRACK. HAND IT OVER.

I think. I’ve kinda given up on Shenelope. Writers seem to insist it’ll never happen. But I sincerely hope their lying, because imo, I don’t honestly think I can stand anymore Leonard/Penny without vomitting compulsively. Seriously.

Well, I think that’s all I have for now.

I wonder if they have wi-fi in Shanghai.

Eh.

I’m proud to say that I learnt how to cycle in one hour! Wahah. (:

But not without the help of a very nice malay cyclist. Speaking of which, he’s the second helpful malay I’ve met that day. The first being a mcdelivery guy, who was nice enough to notice we were kinda lost and gave us the directions we required. Anyway. The chinese though? They snickered/black-faced/stared/laughed as I struggled on my bicycle. Which tells you something about us chinese, huh? I mean, I’m not being racist or anything, but seriously, I’m kinda dead-set on not marrying chinese.

Also, I just, really need to say that Inphase was a teeny byatchy today. Sorry, but yeah. I’m not saying she’s small-sized or whatever, but that she’s acting just a teeny bit over the top. And yes, I’m being childish again, but first, I know what they say about “once bitten, twice shy” like I’ve mentioned previously. But can’t I have a second chance? I feel really repentant, plus, I already offered to be your wake-up call. And second, that rushed conversation was really rude, IMO. You’ve could’ve said you can’t talk long, instead of sounding really desperate to end the call. I was kinda offended ._. Last, you being indecisive and all that. Sometimes, I really wish I could thwack you across the face and still be friends.

And also, I just wanted to say that Claus, you’ve really changed.

I don’t really like the new you.

Alright, enough of ranting. Lets talk teevee!

First, Gossip Girl. But although I thought it was kinda (ahem) slutty at first, what with everyone hooking p with each other and all. But I’m really excited that Nate and Serena will finally get together this season! (: Although she rejects him in this monday’s “The Treasure Of Serena Madre” and leaves with Tripp, in the next episode, “The Debarted”, however, Tripp gets them both involved in a car accident, which I hope lets Nate help her realise that her and Tripp were obviously not to be.

And, the new channel 8 drama, Together, is really quite awesome, I must say. Jeanette and DYT have great chemistry, Elvin is really cute ( “what’s wrong with honk honk?” though it sounds more adorable in chinese ), Kola seems to have the ‘sweet girl’ demeanor down to pat and ZZH and Eelyn are great in their roles.

It’s 1200 now, so Happy Birthday to me, hah.

And thanks for everyone who wished me.

I. Don’t, have a real friend.

Yeah, I have friends that are supposedly “real”.

“Real” enough to always be texting mid-convo and not feel apologetic about it. “Y’know, sure, Emma’s never really complained. She can put up with this shit.” WELL, I CAN’T.

And I have “real” friends, who are always so self-centered. “Real” friends who haven’t heard of the word, COMPROMISE, in their entire frakkin’ life.

I have no one to tell my woes to. No one I can completely trust, be absolutely myself with.

I feel so alone.

I’m tired of hearing you guys say no.

Now, I don’t even want to hear you speak at all.

It’s my birthday celebration, for christs’ sake. Couldn’t you at least try to come? Couldn’t you hear the desperation, the plea in my voice? If I hadn’t bothered about your attendance, would I have asked repeatedly? COULDN’T YOU JUST GIVE IN?

Why do I seem to be the one who has to give in, so very often?

WHY DO YOU PEOPLE KEEP BULLYING ME?

I MAKE SACRIFICES, AND YOU’RE UNHAPPY WITH THEM.

I just.

All, I ever want for my birthday, is somebody who loves me. That’s all.

Because, the rest of my beloved friends don’t seem to.

I’m bored.

Y’know, in america, they’re always talking about summer loves. Well, it’s holidays here, the equivalent of summer. Where’s my “summer love”?

Pardon me. It’s the hormones, lol.

Friends, bley. I’m not gonna say, “who needs them”. It ‘s true that we all need friends. But lately, I’ve been looking at the only friends I have in new shades of lights. I realise that I don’t really have a true confidante. (which brings us back to the no special someone thing. Cos I’d like to bet that I can tell him almost anything) *scoffs* Sure there’s Shawn, who is awesome and everything, but every time I call her, she always has to text someone midway through the conversation. It gets irritating, even for one who has great patience. And then there’s peishan. Yadda yadda yah. She’s suppose to be my closest friend in secondary school, but come on, who ditches their friend on a birthday party to go shopping for power rangers’ cds and shoes in malaysia? Sure it’s a lewd view of the situation, but hey, I’m still a kid, no? I don’t have to do everything so precociously right? Furthermore, she told her mom that if the other two aren’t going, she won’t come either. I mean seriously, wtf? (Also, she’s a terrible junior who talks back. I mean, yeah, I get it, you wanna stand your ground, voice your opinions. But really? What happened to respect your seniors? I mean, I am, in a manner of speaking, still your senior despite our age.) And the two of them aren’t coming either, which makes me both disappointed and kinda glad, really. And you say you want to go have dinner at tampines on Saturday night? Tampines, huh? I am surprised at the paucity of the word compromise in your vocabulary. Yes, I am silently attacking, complaining, “back-stabbing”, you guys. Yeah, uh-huh, I’m admitting it. But everyone has their woes, right? I am entitled to have woes too, right? Cos it’s really hard to be your friends like it is to be mine. And however grateful I am to have you guys, ask yourselves, have we really, really, established a trust amongst us? (ETA: Also, you said we’d get holiday jobs together, but just out of the blue, without even discussing it with me first, you applied for the tampines’ mcdonalds. I have to say, truly, I was hurt. I mean, sure we couldn’t have possibly work together since we live so far apart, but you could’ve talked about it with me first than just dropping the bomb on me all of a sudden right?) And I would like to address that yes, once bitten, twice shy. Sure I totally ditched one time, but I’m really, sincerely, sorry about it. So, just cos I don’t reply your text (thanks for the scars, Lucas), you suddenly say you’re not going to come meet me?

And, oh, speaking of Lucas, seriously, what is up with you? You text me out of the blue, apologise, and then don’t reply me? I mean, yes, retribution, I get it. But haven’t I gone through enough shit from you already? The clay-smearing, the ignoring (which you admitted so yourself), the behind-my-back-stuff-ing (which you’ve also admitted to). No offense, but I wonder how Shandy could tolerate you for, what? Almost a year?

And then I ask myself, should I really pay you back the money? Morally-speaking I should, and I would, someday. But it seems like you don’t really deserve it. I mean, the only reason I feel bad is cos your mom paid for it.

Yes, I am a total byatch for bitching about all this, but I just got a very heavy load I need to get off my chest, uh? And yes, I realise that this is, or will be on the internet, and by any luck, one of you finds it, I’m sorry, okay? This is the past. The past is the past, so let it go if you’re thinking about being mad at me, okay? The current Emma just isn’t feeling very good right now, and people are always telling me not to bottle up stuff, so I’m spraying my coke here, kay?

Oh god, my english standard has seriously taken a nose-dive. But this is good practice, so I guess it’s why my ranting seems a bit relentless. Still, I must ascend up the ladder back to my previous, or even better, a high standard.

Also, did I mention that this birthday celebration thing is sorta depressing? My guest list is totally pathetic. 2. And furthermore, they’re only pending. 8 Days, your horoscope stuff  ain’t accurate. I did embrace it. Courage in the face of adversity? Totally went through that in primary 3 when only 1 person showed up to my birthday party, thanks.

Oh manxzxz.

Also, my mom always and sis never seems to be able to get along, at times. They’re both so stubborn. And, I really can’t stand it that my mom thinks the only way of handling An, is to hit her, while An herself, is just asking to be hit. She broke dad’s Pysch Pineapple. Which he had to order. And ship. From America. In a fit of rage. An, I mean.

My dad certainly didn’t order a squishy pineapple out of anger.

And also, I’m broke! Beejezus, I have gotta stop the whole lavish lifestyle thing. Seriously. Emma, you must think you are (hypothetically) indigent and you live amongst the Skid Rows. Whoo! Used two words from 1100 words book. (:

And woah, that was my first smiley after so many words.

I’m being really negative. That’s bad. Alright, the next line represents a new start. No more grouchiness.

&&&&&&&&&

Alright. It’s officially past 12, which means it’s 26th of Nov, which means it’s An’s birthday!

HAPPY 7TH BIRTHDAY, LIL’ SIS, ILY!

Also, purple, one of your favourites, right? (:

AndohmygoshI’msuchacrappysis. I haven’t gotten her a birthday pressie! I guess I’ll have to go get it tmr ._.

Ah, well, after so much,

goodnight! (:

ETA: Woah, I edited this at least 5 times.

Class chalet was, in the nicest possible way, terrible. Seriously, it’s like the bad aftertaste in your mouth, except, it lasts too long. Also, peishan transmitted her damn cold to me. Ugh.

Streaming results are out! And ohmagahd, I got into my first choice! AND, I get to be in the same class as Jass! (: We’re in 3 CR together ._.

There’s band tmr, and joy of joys I’ve left my scores at home.

Oh, this has been a jolly week-start indeed.

That’s about it.

Oh! Yes, I would just like to say I’m a new shipper of kat/patrick on 10 things I hate about you. They’re another one of those too-awesome tv canon ships, that are actually pretty rare. (:
Also, Ethan Peck is seriously hot (He’s the grandson of Gregory Peck, most notable for his role on TKMK as Atticus Finch) and Lindsey Shaw (Ned’s Declassified School Survival Tips) is gorgeous, so they make a pretty radical couple.

So, here, I sign off.

I also dislike Leonard’s character development. It seems like he’s become more twisted. Bley.

But Sheldon! He gets funnier every episode.:D

Jimmy P. is aweeesome. ♥

Jim & Kaley : And so the chemistry continues to burn. (:

Glee was okay. Not the best, but I’m really looking forward to the November episode “Wheels”!

Torn: which subject combination to take?

EOYs are finally over and I have gotten half my results back. Most of them are pretty satisfactory, especially my literature, despite section c, which has given me the affirmation I need to pursue e.lit next year. In 2010, we will be reading Shakespeare’s A Midsummer Night’s Dream and Things Fall Apart by Chinua Achebe.  Apart from Midsummer which I have previously read, the summary of Fall Apart is intriguing, and reminds me of the Totara Tree passage which Mr. Ahmad gave us for practice. Also in mentioning this, I really hope that he will teach Sec 3 Lit next year, despite having done so this year already.

I find that logic is reassuring, but difficult to trump emotions. Emotions run deep within each human and is an undeniable part of all of us. But sometimes, the pain might not sting so much if we are able to see the reasons for it, as opposed to giving leeway and allowing it to mess with our hearts.

Also, I really want a Macbook.

Yes, you might consider me materialistic since I already own a notebook, but truth be told, you can’t deny that the Mac’s awesome. I mean, come on. The sleek design? The all-white colour theme? The greatest video-editing softwares that is only available for use on the mac which is imminent if I want to pursue a career as a film editor in the future? Well, you get the point.

Back to school-related stuff, I’m really glad that they’re allowing us to just check out scripts then waste our time plowing through the entire paper in debriefs of different subjects, each usually lasting 2 hours, where most students do not even pay attention to the teacher babbling away.

Okay, after the paper on friday, we went to climb Mt. Faber. :O It was, a good exercise, so to speak. (:

Anyway, I’ve been catching up on the fall season shows.

And guess what they have in common? They all made of awesome!

We have, in alphabetical order:

TBBT

Bones

Dollhouse

Glee

HIMYM

Psych

The Vampire Diaries

Warehouse 13

Bold ones are debut shows, and glee is *barney brain explosion* (:

I think that’s about it?

Sorry for the lack of pictures ._.

edit: I also wanna watch The Blue Mansion. But apparently, it’s NC16 D:

Barney & Robin are just made of pure awesome.

One of the best ship ever! (:

I love how when they take cast pictures, she’s always always beside him. Aw.

They’re gonna be LEGEND … wait for it … DARY!